Star Wars: The Clone Wars Review 2

When I exited the theater, I tried to relax my eyes by staring at a wall to make the designs move (which, by the way, was way more interesting).  First off, the makers (conspirators of the proverbial devil, though even Satan himself would probably not want his name attached to this travesty either) did not take our beloved characters and make them into cartoons.  No, they took regular cartoon characters and put Star Wars names to them.  If they’re not going to keep the same characters, why use pre-existing characters at all?

Yeah, my head is shaking along with yours.  Anakin gets a female apprentice (without ever becoming a Jedi master…once again, I don’t get it either) who ends up being, quite simply, the most annoying character in Star Wars history.  Combine Jar Jar Binks, C-3PO at his whiniest and Salacious Crumb and multiply by ten, and you’ll get the picture.  I never thought a cartoon character could rile up my hatred to its most penetrating boil, but it happened.  The animation was straight out of 1981, the battle scenes we saw were nothing special, and no one explained why Jabba the Hutt (a MOB boss, if you remember) would turn to law enforcement (re: the Jedi) for help, when he’s doing a bunch of illegal acts.  And why would the Jedi help him anyway?  Aargh, it’s more infuriating than, well, the last Star Wars movie.

So, if you want to sit through this nonsense and pretend there’s a good story, and that all is still hunky-dory with the Star Wars universe, go ahead.  You have been warned.  For myself, I’d rather watch the walls move (oh, wait, that’s what I did…)

0 / 5 stars (and that is a TLMR first)

Soooo that is it. These are my thoughts. Do you agree? What do you think? What was you reaction? Share your thoughts and opinions in the comments below!